My Rock

Should I take that path?

Up in the sky with her 

Looking at the ground from a far distance

Everything seems small

They talk, they doubt, they judge

"I'm sure it will work out" she says

Purple turns into blue

Yellow into red 

I learn from what I see

Prosperity is what I want

To get it, I hurt and hurt...

Until she speaks again

No matter what, she's there

The one who stands by me 

The one who knows it all 

That forceful, poised rock

My blanket, my lucky-charm

The essence of my heart

There to support me...

Until days re-become bright

The gain surpassing the loss

Blue turning into purple

Red turning into yellow

It all makes sense again

 

More Sports = Less Drugs

Image from http://www.dreamstime.com/

About 60% of my days when I was a teen was spent doing some type of sport. If you needed to find me, all you had to do was to look for a soccer field, a volleyball court, a basket-ball square or a marital-art club. Yes, I was a sport junky… It was my food, my essence… My life. 

My family was a bit worried that I was too much into sports—except my mom who was always supportive. In reality, most parents would be worried. They’re concerned that their little girl is a tomboy and may want to become a “boy” when she grows up. Or, they are afraid that their child’s career goal is to become a sport’s teacher (because let’s face it, deep inside, most parents want their child to become a lawyer, an engineer or a doctor). So apparently, a girl who spends 60% of her time competing in sports is a RED FLAG for disaster. Really?

What most parents don’t realize is that involving their kid in physical activity is probably the BEST thing they can do for them. Believe it or not, the likelihood of a teenager taking drugs or even cigarettes is considerably low if he practices sports on a daily basis. Why? Well, 2 reasons: First of all because he doesn’t have time for that nonsense (between practices, games, and school, there is little time left for anything else); and second, because he is getting all the adrenaline he needs from sports (so doesn’t need or want to venture into drugs).  Besides, a young athlete who wants to continue shining in his sport’s skills would not want to poison his body with drugs (normally).

Aside from being healthy, what being an athlete brought me was the chance to avoid all the “dangers” of teenage-life. I just simply had not time for high-school drama, drugs, alcohol or cigarettes. Half my friends were drinking or smoking by the age of 14—mostly those who were not doing any type of sports. Me, I got my epinephrine from the rush of winning games or scoring the best goal. The advantages of that are:

1. I was rarely in trouble at school. And if you are not in trouble, you tend to…
2. … Succeed faster (getting good grades easily for example), then possibly getting a scholarship for college.
3. Teachers adore you and the administration of the school respects you. So life in your high-school days is just a bliss.
4. Everyone wants to be your friend because you are "smart" and "popular" (whatever that means).
5. Your parents are extremely proud of you. Thus, you are allowed to do almost anything you want in exchange of being a ‘good child’.

So parents, let your kid join any sports club she wishes to. It doesn’t matter how many sports she wants to practice… Let her do all of them if she wants. When it’s too much, she will know, don’t worry. Truth it, the more she exercises, the healthier she gets… But also the smarter she becomes. Yes, that’s right, exercising boosts blood flow in the brain, which helps improve memory skills. In addition, it provides faster cognitive functions. So why stop your kid from being an athlete?

Image from http://www.dreamstime.com/

Let me be specific though. When I speak about sports, I’m talking about competitive sports. I mean being involved with an actual club that has championship games and regular practices. I don’t believe that merely doing sports for leisure is enough to reduce the likelihood of falling into bad habits. Oh and by the way, it doesn’t have to be sports only; it can be music, art, theatre… As long as they are done seriously and regularly, in the long run, they have the same benefits as sports.

Remember, most people don’t start drinking, smoking or using drugs because they have problems (that comes after). They start when they are teens because they are bored or think it’s “cool”. So if your kid is too busy with sports/art/theatre/music and is cool thanks to his/her skills, why in the world would he/she start smoking or drinking?

This post was based on my knowledge and experience, but also information I gathered from the following articles:

http://www.theantidrug.com/pdfs/ei/parents_brochure.pdf

http://alcoholism.about.com/cs/tipsforparents/a/aa111297.htm

http://www.better-brains.com/post/5066318840/sport-is-good-for-the-brain

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/186790.php

http://psychcentral.com/news/2008/09/02/sports-can-improve-brain-function/2863.html

Is Photography Really Art?

I work in the world of photography now—photojournalism to be more precise. It's a field I was not really knowledgeable about 2 or 3 years ago. Of course, I can see a beautiful picture and have a "wow" moment, but I never really knew much about photography as an art until about 2 years ago. 

Montreal, Québec, Canada                      By Mariam Sambe

Now that I’m immersed by it (it really is all around me), photography is starting to have a different meaning. The way it can be used as one of the best tools of expression is what I admire the most. I've met amazing photographers (even some who are as young as 14 years old) and learned a great deal.

Having said this, there is still something I have a hard time putting my fingers on: Is photography really art? By definition, I guess it is. The Longman Dictionary defines art as follows: “the use of painting, drawing, sculpture, etc to represent things or express ideas”. Does photography express ideas? DEFINITELY. So yes, by definition, photography is art.

Note that the title of this post is “is photography really art”? Emphasis on “really”. When someone asks: “is this really true?” it means that they accept that part of it is true, but are doubtful about the other part. So this is exactly what I’m doing with my “is photography really art?”. By definition, it is. No questions asked. But what about the rest?

 Haliburton, Ontario, Canada                                        By Mariam Sambe  

Here is my issue, in other forms of art (sculpture, painting, drawing for instance), I find that it requires WAYYYY more attention, patience, creativity, thought, skill, and meticulousness to produce art. Now this is not to say that you don’t need all this for photography. Of course you do. But probably not in the same level.

In 1 hour, a photographer can take hundreds of pictures, whereas a painter can paint 1 landscape. Of course, out of the hundreds of pictures that the photographer took there might only be 1 that is beautiful. Yes, but she still had about 100 chances to make it right, didn’t she? And if that doesn’t work, she can always use Photoshop and add some touches to it. The painter doesn't have that option, if he messes up, he messes up. 1 chance to make it right, and if it doesn't work, he starts all over again (or change what he was planning to paint).

In addition to that, art school in general takes a minimum of 4 years of study (plus amazing talent). Photography school takes 1 year, maybe 2. Doesn't this mean in a way that painting, drawing and sculpture require something more than photography? Most people become photographers without even having to go to school. They are self-taught or simply talented. I started to take photos myself. Some of my pictures are terrible, some are just okay, and some are great. Does that mean I’m an artist now? That’s it? Just like that?

Is Photography really art? I posted this question on my Facebook wall. Below are a few comments I got (for confidentiality reasons, I only put my friends’ initials after their quote):  

Gondar, Ethiopia                                 By Mariam Sambe

 “It is. Truth is, good photography takes talent, imagination, creativity, etc, so I do believe there is a point of it being an art. Now are other forms of art more art than photography? I can debate that.” W.N.

“Definitely art... There are photos and then there is art, you can see a million pictures but when someone can communicate story, emotion, beauty, imagination in their photo...that's art.” T.S.

“What's so creative about pointing a freakin' camera and clicking??? It is not art. Granted, it takes skill and patience to find and take the perfect picture but it's definitely not art. I'm not belittling it and I have seen some incredibly breathtaking pictures but it's not art. It's just a skill” K.N.

“the pure process of taking of pictures might not necessarily be considered art by some, but that's not all photography entails... it is about the selection of the motif, the lighting, the overall scene. There are millions of pictures taken all around the world on any given day, but only a select few have the overall beauty that a piece of art has. Those pieces of photography are definitely art, whereas the rest is just pure "picture taking" by everyday people. It’s almost comparing a painting of your 10 year old daughter to a Picasso...” R.W.

Honolulu, Hawai'i, USA                        By Mariam Sambe 

“ L’art de la photographie dépend plus du photographe à mon avis. c'est l'intention du photographe qui donne du sens à l'image et au message communiqué. Quand il y a de l'art dans l'âme et l'œil du photographe, il y en aura forcement dans le travail produit. ” K.C.

Is Photography really art? Clearly, there is no straight answer for this... In reality, I think it depends on how each of us defines art. The matter of fact is, a photo piece can be as breathtaking (if not more) as a painting or a sculpture—even if it might seem simpler to produce it.

Dilemmas

There comes a time in life when you are torn between making choices; that dilemma that everyone wishes to avoid, and yet, experiences quite often. It can be something as simple as “should I order fish or chicken”,  “do I walk or take the bus”. These choices are quite easy to make (for most people) and do not require too much reflection.

Then there are those other crucial dilemmas that will change your life one way or the other:

From: http://concurseirosolitario.blogspot.ca/2012/03/o-dilema-do-cursinho.html 

- Should I really get married now?

- Should I quit my job?

- Should I go to university?

- Should I move to China?

- Should I buy that apartment?

- Should I send my kids to private or public school?

We all go through some tough decisions like these at some point in our lives, and what makes them hard is that we cannot see our future, so we have NO idea what will happen if we make (or don’t make) a choice. So we hate it… We dread it.

From: http://sujenman.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/fear-of-failure-768216.gif

Most people try to avoid these dilemmas for fear of falling. They are afraid that it won't work, so they simply don't try. Some just want to avoid that difficult phase of making a decision. It’s stressful; it’s uncomfortable; it’s complicated, so yeah, it’s easier to avoid it, right? 

WRONG! Unfortunately people like this stay in the same job for years (yet, they complain about that job everyday), don’t buy anything huge, never move, and so forth.

The truth is, the more you have choices to make along the way, the more you actually have a life. Living without having doubts, fears, issues, is simply NOT living. So to me, dilemmas are one of the best things to have in life. In fact, I think they’re great. I truly appreciate them. And I think we all should to a certain extent. I am grateful for all the dilemmas I’ve had in my life because they gave me purpose. The challenges that come with each problem taught me something new. Every time I have a dilemma, I learn… I grow… I live.

Don’t be afraid to take that step toward a change; to take a path toward a new plan. Change is ALWAYS good, no matter what. Even if the change you go through makes you less happy than what you were, you still learned something out of it… So it’s not a loss. In fact it means that you have reasons to be here. Congratulations you are alive!

Be, Pray, Love

At some point in your life, you may become responsible for a child that is not yours: maybe as an aunt/uncle, a sponsor, a babysitter, a godparent, or a teacher. I am all of those. But the one I particularly want to talk about today is the challenge, but also the honor of being a Godparent.  

I have 3 Godchildren: the child of a random person I met at church once; the son of my cousin; and the daughter of my best friend . Although I supposedly play the same roles in the lives of all these 3 kids, the way I go about it is completely different. The relationship I have with each of them is unique.

 

Let me start with my oldest Godchild who is about 10 years old. I met him accidentally in a Village called Taza, in southern Ethiopia. During Mass celebration, his mother came to me and asked me to be her son’s Godmother. I had never met her before so I was surprised. But I was also touched and honored at the same time. As I am not from that village, I had to remind her that I was not going to be able to visit this child or even have any contact with him (she had no access to internet or phone). But she said: “you keep him in your prayers, and God will do the rest”. Her devotion  affected me deeply and that's when I discovered the power of faith.

The Christening mass was beautiful. She named her son Beruk, meaning blessed. Today, I often find myself praying for him. I’ve never seen him after his baptism, and I have no way of finding him unless I go back to Taza, but Beruk is always in my mind, and I truly hope that my prayers are reaching him.  The church says: “the role of a Godparent is mainly to assist the person in Christian initiation”, which I did at his Christening day. However, it also says: “to have a continuous presence as a Christian model of faith for the child”, and this I am lacking. I hope that one day I will be able to go back to Taza and see how grown Beruk has become.

My 2^nd Godson is 6 years old. He’s the cutest kid I know – and I’m not just saying that because he’s my Godchild – he is really the cutest.     ßLook at him (this is when he was 3). His mom is my cousin (but we grew up as sisters). So in a way, my Godson is also my nephew. And that comes with double responsibility—and double the joy.

As an aunt/Godmother, I want to make sure that he gets EVERYTHING he needs in life. From good grades, to skills in sports, art and music, to a nice and strong personality. So far, so good. He makes me proud on every level. And that’s why I say the joy is elevated. The challenge however, is that we live far apart, hence, I can only talk to him via phone/Skype. It breaks my heart not to play with him or talk to him directly. But thanks to technology, we are building a relationship that will enable us to pick up right where we left off.

Last, my Goddaughter (my best friend's child). She is the youngest of all my Godchildren. She is only one year old, but I feel like I’ve known her for many years.  What amazes me is that in reality, I barely know her (as I only saw her for a month), but the love I have for her surpasses my understanding. Every time I hear her voice or see pictures/videos of her, my heart hops. Of course, I understand that the first reason for that is simply that she is my close-friend’s daughter. So even if she had given birth to an ogre, I’d love that baby tenderly. Yet, there is another reason. When you comprehend the role that you have to play for this child as a Godmother, you soon start to develop something more than simply caring and loving her… It’s more of a noble responsibility.

As my Goddaughter grows older, I have (and want) to be some type of role model to her. I may have to help her with decisions related to religious choices; help her with school choices (if she needs more advice than what her parents would give her). I also simply have to be there for her whenever she needs me; as the church says: “to be part of the godchild's life for the remaining of his/her life”. This is definitely hard. First of all because we live on different continents,  and second because being part of someone’s life comprises a tremendous amount of discipline and faith on both parties.

Image from http://www.pagecovers.com/view_cover/i_love_my_godchild.html

“The greatest gifts that a godparent can give to a child are love and prayers”, these I give. What is missing is my physical presence in the kids' lives. The 'be' in Be, Pray, Love.  If airplanes were faster and cheaper, I’d be a much better Godparent… Maybe one day; for now, I just pray and Love.

The quotes used in this post were taken from: http://www.catholicdoors.com/courses/godpar.htm